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She felt the cold steel running over a part of her throat, the stinging sensation as the blade made it's cut. Rhigas hand around her wrist suddenly felt very cold as the blood quickly left her, soaking her shoulder. Almost instantly the world around her got blurry, Rhigas face over her was quickly disappearing in front of her, absorbed by the twirl of colors of the world that turned into a grey nothingness. She heard someone screaming her name and she couldn't help but smiling as everything turned black and for once in a long while all the pain was gone. All she felt was calm, content, it was over.
She was happy, free, the cottonlike darkness embraced her with nothingness... For the first time in her life she felt as if gotten home. For hours, weeks, years, she just lied there. Safe. Then suddenly intense pain, she had forgotten about pain, didn't even know it existed anymore. Her forehead was on fire, it burnt, her blood started to boil, she wanted to scream but there was no sound. Her belly started to burn she felt as if her insides turned to ash and it didn't stop. It felt like an eternity had passed when the pain finally stopped. And only a moment did she feel the cottonlike darkness embrace her again before she was suddenly pulled away. She fought for her life to stay there, tried to grip to anything but there was nothing. slowly, slowly she was lifted up, worldly pain started to seep into her being and she could have cried if there was any tears where she was. She heard voices but she couldn't recognize them, she didn't even understand what they said. She tried to force her way back to the cottonlike embrace again but no matter how much she fought it let her go and she was back. She felt the pain in her body, she felt crushed as if a kodo had sat down on her.
She tried to move but nothing wanted to work, not even a finger could she lift, she wanted to open her eyes but her eyelids refused her, she tried to scream but she couldn't open her mouth. Pain, everywhere pain.
She heard voices, they seemed familiar but it was like a thick wall between the source of them and herself. She felt confused, something in the voices pulled at her but she wanted back into the darkness. Something was struggling to keep her from it and she once again tried to scream to ask what ever it was to let her go. Her efforts didn't do her any good, she felt herself getting weaker and weaker but still she fought, It felt like she was dying and all she wanted was to get back to the safe place where there was nothing. The voices got louder and louder and finally she heard them clear and the pain of knowing took her... She fell into a different kind of darkness, she felt fear and panic ride her and then she lost consciousness.

She slumped down on the cliff her breathing heavy after the long run. The wheezing sounds screamed in her ears and every breath pained her chest but she embraced the pain. The pain was soothing, the pain she could handle. She took up a knife and pulled off her glove while sobbing and ripped the bracers from the left arm and didn't even care to watch the pieces of it fall down to the ground and over the cliff into the water and slowly float away. Slowly and methodically she started cutting small, perfectly fine lines into her heavily scarred flesh. To see the blood seep out calmed her feelings and she closed her eyes and just enjoyed the stinging pain from the wounds. After a while her breathing calmed as well and finally her mind went numb. Without even noticing she dropped the knife and it fell down to the river and sank to the bottom to forever be forgotten.

Eventually she came back to her senses and tiredly opened her eyes to meet the morning light and she blinked a couple of times to give the eyes a chance to get used to the brightness. She looked down at her arm and tilted her head as she watched the still bleeding wounds... they where seven. Why seven? She wrinkled her forehead as her mind slowly started working as she tried to figure out why there where seven wound. Why not six or eight or ten? why seven? She moved her right hand up to her face and absentmindedly wiped the tears away but her mind couldn't apprehend why or how her cheeks got wet, it was too occupied with the thought of how many wounds she had on her arm. As the blood slowly dripped down on the stone under her she felt her heart slowly starting to beat again, the ringing of it echoed in her ears and she whimpered slightly as she realized she was still alive.

She clutched her hands around her head and pulled at her hair as the screams inside her made the world around her an empty blackness of nothing. Slowly the pained screams hushed and after a while there was only silence. She sat still, waiting, then after a long while as her breathing stopped hurting she opened her eyes again and the world once again emerged before her. The world that seemed so unreal to her now, nothing in it was what it seemed, everything was a lie.
She stretched her back and grunted as the cracking sounds made it clear to her that she had been sitting far much longer than she had thought. She looked up at the sky and frowned, the stars where gone and the sun where already up. She slowly got up on her feet and stretched them out and felt the pain as the blood started moving through them again as it should. She closed her eyes and just let the pain fill her senses... this was something she was familiar with.. this was something she knew how to handle... She got to the ledge and then climbed down the wall to the balcony and went inside. Still it was quiet but she knew the varog'gor was awake.

She woke up and quickly sat up and dragged her head down between her knees as she pulled her hair. The screams filled her head again and the pain went through her like red steel, burning her from the inside. She sucked in air between numb lips but the air didn't want to fill her lungs with life. She felt the darkness embrace her and the world around her faded out from existence. The she heard a voice in her head, calling for her, Swiftblade... it was her name was it not? Slowly she forced herself out of the darkness and yes, there it was... the voice again, female, bitter, calling for her. How long had she been out? She blinked her eyes as she slowly started to get a grasp of things again, cooking pots, a fire, piles of crates and bags, the smell of food. She turned to look at the fire and quickly moved to take the pot of it. a slightly burnt smell hit her nose and she realized she had burned the stew. She let out a silent grunt as she poured some of it into a wooden bowl and quickly grabbed a spoon and a filled waterskin before heading up the stairs. She may yell at me for being late and bringing her burned stew but at least I did my best, isn't that what she asked for? She smirked to herself then chuckled slightly before going silent as she got closer to the chieftains tower room.

The she-orc sneaked out of the tower without even bothering putting on her clothes. Her bare feet moved over the wooden planks softly and as silent as a falling leaf in the wind. The cool, early morning breeze made her nipples pull together into hard knots and goosebumps quickly formed on her naked skin. As her feet touched the dewy grass a shiver went up her spine and she stood still a while with closed eyes and just took the sensation in. She took a deep breath, filling her nose with the forest, and then squatted down to sneak off into the underbrush with the raising sun at her back.

As she silently flew forward she saw the forest wake from it's slumber, the strange colorless dawn turned into a breathtaking display as the sun set the sky on fire which in return created an explosive reaction as the forest came back to life. The trees that had been grey and dreary now proudly crackled with colors. The rivers that had been flowing quietly in it's blackness now turned clear blue and the rippling sound greeted her as the dew turned into mist in a morning embrace. She slowed down as her lungs started burning in her chest and her still healing ribs ached with every breath. She slumped down on the ground by a tree and leaned back against the rough bark, it felt damp against her skin and once again a shiver went up her spine. She sat quiet and just listened. First she could only hear her own wheezing as her body struggled with every breath, but slowly the wheezing subsided and the sounds of the forest filled her ear. The scent of green and moisture filled her nose and as she opened her mouth she could taste the wind that brought her the essence of Ashenvale.

To much time had past since she last ran free. To much time had past since her will was taken from her. She felt trapped and as the anxiety slowly built up she crawled up sobbing. As the panic and fear rode her she felt like a child again, old memories came to life of the whip that cut through her skin on her back and her thighs, the knife that over and over and over again cut stright, prefectly stright lines into her forearms. The old memories turned into new ones as the demons robbed her from her life. Her life... it wasn't hers anymore, there wasn't even a life anymore. As the fear and pain subsided she slowly sat up again dragging herself back to the tree and leaned against it's comforting real surface... rough, damp, pulsing with life and wisdom. She pressed her hands against it to make sure it was real. She noticed that her cheeks where wet and as she moved her hands to her face to wipe the tears of she saw them again... She stared at them with disgust, followed every line... on her legs, on her arms, on her stomach, on her breasts... everywhere, all over her body the abhorrent scars left from the runes that had been carved into her flesh. She was nothing, worth nothing... all she was had been taken from her first by him, then the tribe, then the demons... Her life was a lie, her spirit was hollow... She pressed her hands against her chest and she felt it... The heart was still beating, the mockery was complete.

My idea for food.
Friday: we go to a restaurant since we have all been traveling and might not feel like makeing food of any kind. we go back to camp and drink some
Saturday: Grog have fixed shit for breakfast, we eat it. We go to store and buy stuff for evening firefun. we eat dinner, we drink some more and have fun.
Sunday: we obviously bought some breakfast food as well and now eats it! We don't drink more cause we are going home

over fire I'd say camping and all you know as someone pointed out earlier we can go to a restaurant or something some day too but some meat and vegetables wrapped in bacon and put it all on the grill is good food *nods*

the pineapple for grogona is a must... I think everyone should bring him one... just as big as we think he deserves
I'd like to come but it depends on how much it will cost and my health at the time but I sure would try Don't like to travel alone though due to said health ^^

A bit randomly I'll be away for a week... going Turkey tomorrow and will be back 2 july. so uhm guess Goru is all lying in bed resting and repairing silly demolisher or something

I'll make sure to think of you all while 'm on the beach with an ice-cold mojito in my hand

Goru, rogue dps.... or maybe Phern, Warlock dps... depends if you really want me to join since I'm not the best at pvp ^^

She had never been to Nagrand, never seen Draenor, only heard the stories from her mother. It was just as beautiful as she always described it if not more. It was hard to describe this kind of beauty, it wasn't only the land itself, the visual beauty. There where something here that just shone from within, a presence maybe. She couldn't put her finger on what it was about this place, but she had never felt as much at home anywhere ever before. It was like her ancestors where here, not only like in the shamans talk about spirits, she could really see them, or sense them should maybe be a better word for it.
It scared her somewhat, especially when she thought she saw them, here in Garadar, walking around just as if they where alive. It was mind numbing to know they where all around her, that they watched everything she did... Judging her.
Gosh'kar had helped her getting in contact with her mother and the thought of what happened made her shiver and she felt her cheeks getting warm. At first Goru never thought it was possible to get in touch with her mother, she had accepted that she was gone forever. But then she wished she had never asked for it. The shame filled her chest as she remembered the painful meeting. Her own mother had called her so many things, yelled at her. She had been so angry and the worst part, she called her a disgrace for her bloodline. Goru had always had her mothers support, her soothing words always assuring she was proud of her no matter what... But now she understood that her not even her mother liked her, she was ashamed of her.
Goru covered her face in her palms and took a shivering breath then rubbed her temples as the headache set in. Her father couldn't stand her and her mother said she was a failer. She sighed and looked out over the green planes of Nagrand and leaned back on the tree. Both her parents where ashamed that she was of their blood, both her parents hated her... And so did the tribe, her new -family-.
Maybe it was time to leave? No one here felt she had anything to bring to the tribe. No one had anything good to say about her, they where only competing about who could insult her the most. She felt tired, so tired, of defending herself and to feel her walls go up. Those damn walls that made her act like an disrespectful little cunt. But she would never let anyone insult her or her family without biting back. It wasn't in her nature to just sit back and take shit. But it was tiring to never have even one day of peace and calm. So yes, maybe it was time to leave, to find a place where she really belonged. She had sought these people out for one reason and she hadn't seen him in weeks, not since he put Karak in his place.
Of course there was Gosh'kar and the old drunk and Troxigar. But mostly there where only Troxigar, the one who actually liked talking to her. With Gosh'kar it was on a day to day basis. Goru smirked and her hand moved up to the handshaped burn mark on her throat, it was healing but it was still sore. That orc had some real fire inside of her and it was wonderful to see it, to see her strength, her fierce nature, but damn did it hurt. Goru couldn't help but grinning a bit, Gosh'kar was someone she could maybe get along with very well in the future. There was no middlepath there, either they would get really close or they would become the worst enemies. At the moment it was going in the direction of the first, but one could never know, Gosh'kar was very unpredictable... So was Goru herself and she knew it.
She stood up and took her satchel and hung it up over her shoulder, letting it rest on her back and she took one last look at the planes then started walking back to the inn. Maybe give it one more week? The decision to leave shouldn't be taken lightly. Maybe there where still a chance to get to know her father and finally get that feeling of belonging she was dreaming about. Maybe she could still find a way to impress, show these orcs that she was someone to count on.

((When you all wake up this morning you will wake up to the smell of grilled meat and everyone will be offered to have some for breakfast))

Goru took her time and crawled close to the ground towards the big birds, she knew Troxigar was not far away, ready to do his part. The birds seemed a bit nervous and she stopped instantly, just watching them without moving a muscle. The night was almost over and the sun was soon coming up. She was soaked in sweat and her clothes and skin where covered in dust. It was starting to get itchy but both she and Troxigar knew they had to get a couple more before going back to the Mag'har post. Both their wolves had a large amount of birds tied up on their back and she felt bad when seeing her old, gentle mount hang his head, he looked so tired the poor thing. He had been with her for a long time, but this hunt had made her understand that it might be time to set him free and find another.
She focused on the birds again as they settled and started crawling again and winced as another stone dug into her knee but she kept totally quiet. When she got close enough she took a deep breath and readied herself. She heard her heart beat and felt the wind on her face and for a moment everything around her slowed down before her and she knew exactly wich bird to go for first and what would be her next pray. She flew up from the ground and before the birds even realized what was happening the first bird fell to the ground with one of her knives in the head. Right after another bird crashed down on the ground with one of Troxigars arrows pointing out of the body. Her next knife flew through the air and the second target got hit, but it was a bad throw and it only opened a gash on the side. She snarled angrily and drew her daggers as the furious bird came at her. She heard Troxigar shouting something but she ignored it, she had to focus. She felt her heart beating fast as the bird came closer. She dodged the vicious claws but the long night had taken it's toll and she felt the beak rip through her leather armor on her left arm at the same time as she buried her dagger in the side of the bird. It fell dead down just as another arrow flew past her just an inch from her head and she instinctively threw herself backwards.
She took a moment to catch her breath then flew up again and looked around her in the hope of finding yet another pray and she saw one... a really big one flew straight towards her, an arrow that's stuck in the wing made it a bit difficult for it to move gracefully. She hissed at it then a grin spread on her face and she ran towards it. She moved as quickly as she could and jumped from side to side to confuse the creature and it wasn't a very hard kill.
She looked down on the ground around her on the dead birds and then up in the air and growled as the rest flew away, far out of her reach. She would have wanted to get at least two more but it had been hard hunting with Trox. She had to rethink everything she did, half the time he had taken the pray she had fixed her eyes on and it wasn't very unusual that he missed his target but this had to take the price. They where tired and should have gone back to the mag'har post at least two hours ago, but she really wanted to make sure everyone would get some fresh meat for breakfast. She pulled out her knife from the first one she hit and wiped it off carelessly in the dirty pants then went to look for the other that had missed. She frowned as she peered around the ground to find it, she almost never missed her target so completely, it was embarrassing really. She suddenly noticed that the sun had come up and she heard Troxigar coming towards her with the wolfs. He was panting as if he had been running half the way and she turned around and raised her eyebrows at him, ”You alright Goru?”, he looked concerned and she nodded. ”I thought I hit you there for a moment, I was aiming at the bird but then you moved, I'm really sorry”. She looked at him a while then chuckled, ”You aint no master marksman, that's for sure Trox, and I'm alright and we got some more birds so stop worrying”, She gave him a bright smile and he smiled back at her. She watched him as he started picking up the heavy birds one by one and throw them over the back of his wolf, then went back to trying to find that damn knife.

Goru wiped the sweat from her forehead stretched her neck. They had worked like slaves for what seemed to be an eternity, but of course it wasn't, she was just so very tired. The Mag'har chef was helping out and so did some others as well. She could have cried when they offered their help. She never knew how much work it would be to fix fresh meat for breakfast for the whole tribe. She had regretted her decision many times during the night but the hard work also made her more focused, she would fix this even if she feinted of exhaustion. Troxigar was tired as well, but he worked quietly, doing his part and more. He was probably tired of her bitching at him for being lazy.
Her thoughts where interrupted as the chef came up to her and he grunted to get her attention, ”The fires are ready and I'll start cooking now. It's all prepped, I can do the rest. I make sure your tribe gets their breakfast when they wake up. The two of you should go to bed though, get some sleep.”, She just gave him a tired nod and mumbled a thank you then she forced her feet to get her to move forward. In the corner of her eye she saw Troxigar do the same and she turned to him and just patted him on the shoulder, ”I'm glad you came with me Trox, couldn't have done it without you”. He gave her a weak smile and then they dragged themselves to bed.

She sat on the hill, looking out over the ocean, all alone. The only time she could really think was when being alone, maybe she had been alone, tending only her own needs for far too long to be able to think properly around others. They called themselves a family, big damn family, that's for sure. Too many people having an opinion of how she should act, what she could and could not say, what she could do. She closed her eyes quickly as she felt her eyes tearing up, she blinked a couple of times and slapped herself on the cheek. She couldn't cry, he had told her that she couldn't, not very orcish apparently.

Her father, who was he really? She thought about it and realized that they hadn't spoken much and the talks they had had mostly been them butting their heads in throwing insults and other shit to one another. Maybe Rosh'kar was right in her advice to go ask him to teach her of their ways, but only time could tell. She had asked him, had been very polite, even said please. She almost gagged at the word please spoken to that orc, thickheaded stubborn insulting cunt, that's what he is. But he had said yes, maybe he actually did want to teach her their ways, and to fight. But so far he hadn't sat down with her to do it, to be fair she hadn't even seen him around. She had thought about seeking him out but decided that it was better to let him be the one to take the next step. She had taken the first one, it was his turn now. She nodded to herself and smirked, most probably the old man will find someone else to do what she asked of him. He clearly couldn't stand her so why ever would he spend too much time with her, it's not gonna happen. She sighed again and took a deep breath, I just have to wait and see, I can't only fixate on the negative things of life... I have to give the man a chance to prove her wrong in her thoughts about him.

She grabbed the heavy satchel by her side and grunted by the wait as she picked it up and put it in her lap. She smiled faintly as she heard the clinking sound of the gold inside it. She hugged it and giggled to herself. At least some things turned to the better for her. She was rich now, she could buy what ever she needed. So far that meant a pair of leather trousers and some leather armor, not very good shit, but good enough at least. Seemed like it was approved by her father. And to be fair, it felt very good not to walk around in those old rags she had on when finding them. She was clean, she started to get some meat on her bones and she felt stronger then she had felt in years. But the sleeping problems was the same... hard to sleep during the days due to the damned sun, hard to sleep during the nights cause she felt she might miss out on something. She looked up at the moon and sighed, she loved the night, it was her time, but not tonight... tonight she would sleep. Slowly she stood up and went back to the spot she had claimed. The tribe might wanna sleep in the goblin settlement, but not me... I'm just fine out here. She smiled happily as she walked and as closer she got to the spot the warmer she felt inside.

Goru woke up and quickly drew her dagger, something must have waken her up. It took a few moment for her to make the world around her real, make her brain work. The sun hurt her eyes and she blinked a couple of times and shielded them with her free hand. Her back was a bit sore and stiff after sleeping on uneven stone and she grunted as she stretched it out a bit. She noticed the cloak that had been wrapped around her and felt the smell of it in her nose still. The memories came back and she slowly put down the dagger, she had finally found him, her father.
It hadn't been the best start of a relationship, but he had asked her to stay, several times actually. Still she had a big lump of discomfort in her chest that she wasn't wanted here. She absently moved her hand up to her aching left shoulder and groaned slightly as she looked down on it. It was swollen and it made the arm a bit stiff and a big, dark blue bruise had formed. She frowned in disappointment, "damn brute", her voice pressed out between her lips and she frowned again. Just a couple of hours and her father had already gave her a mark. Maybe it was his way, hit the ones he couldn't control as he wished. Mozrogg, Doomhowl they called him, a big orc with a big ego and a list of rules already building up on how a daughter should be acting. She frowned at the thought of him, at least she knew now where she got her temper from... and in all fairness, her stubbornness.
She thought back on the night before and for the first time in a very long time she felt strange, like some kind of guilt was sucking at her lifeforce. She hit her chest hard, trying to make the feeling go away but it only grew tighter in there and she could feel some kind of heat on her cheeks so she looked up in the sky and frowned at the sun.
She hated the sun, too bright, too hot, too damn annoying. Light and heat and telling too many damn stories. She blinked her eyes to get the white dots away from her eyesight and looked around her as she picked up the cloak from the cold stone. She was sure no one was looking her way and she pulled it up against her chest and her face and burrowed her nose in it, breathing in deeply. The smell of her father. She took another deep breath and couldn't help but smiling slightly then folded the cloak carefully and put it down on the ground, close to the cave wall.
She had work to do, she had to try and find some fur or leather, she wasn't really sure what, but that she-orced wanted something to be able to make some new clothes for Goru. She looked down at her old rags and felt another strange feeling build up, shame. The heat came back to her cheeks as she realized just in what shape they where. Hardly hanging together, dirty and stale... For the first time in a very long time she tried to look upon herself objectively and she closed her eyes at the sight. No wonder they called her a fecking whore, she looked like one, that's for sure. She shake her head and gathered her thoughts, two quests for today then... Finding materials for new clothes or some new already done clothes and of course... Most importantly, she needed to refill her satchel with alcohol. Just the thought of it made her feel a slight shiver working it's way through her body and she licked her lips nervously. Yes, most importantly I need to find alcohol...