Throm'ka!

Welcome to Guest. Please log in or sign up.

May 08, 2024, 07:42:39 AM

Recent

Shoutbox

Zakarah:
2023 Dec 29 21:06:51
I think Rashka.exe has stopped working.
Rashka:
2023 Dec 28 20:49:43
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA... A.
Realyn/Eliff:
2023 Jul 22 22:17:06
Such shouty people in here, gosh.
Rashka:
2023 Jul 20 01:42:16
Remember to shout your lungs out every once in a while!!
Kozgugore:
2023 Jul 08 17:30:53
Shouting here to make sure everyone knows that I'm still here!
Ootah:
2022 Jan 24 23:27:52
Wow I can't believe I remembered my password!
Razaron:
2021 Dec 18 15:37:28
<dances>
Vraxxar:
2021 Nov 10 12:24:52
Remember to check both ways before crossing the plains!
Vraxxar:
2021 May 22 14:10:40
I too am testing the shoutbox for non-nefarious reasons.
Kozgugore:
2021 May 22 13:55:49
This is me testing the shoutbox, because shouting is a great stress relief and it would be a shame if it doesn't work.
Rashka:
2021 Mar 25 03:38:20
IM SHOUTING SO HARD RIGHT NOW YOU GUYS.
Claws:
2020 Nov 20 00:14:09
Ice cream for all
Realyn/Eliff:
2020 Oct 09 09:49:55
Happy Anniversary!!! It's party timeeee!
Vraxxar:
2020 Sep 24 12:39:42
Oh god. The warlock found the shoutbox!
Gashuk:
2020 Sep 23 16:42:21
THE SHOUTBOX. Omg. This was like proto-Discord.
Vraxxar:
2020 Aug 23 09:36:02
*Grabs a camera to record what happens*
Nakobu:
2020 Aug 22 16:24:43
*prods shoutbox*
Razaron:
2020 Jun 16 10:34:12
<dances>
Vraxxar:
2020 Jun 05 13:32:27
Swedish Pagans?
Kozgugore:
2020 Jun 01 09:45:09
You're invoking the wrong gods in this place!

Stats

Members
Stats
  • Total Posts: 33082
  • Total Topics: 3067
  • Online Today: 241
  • Online Ever: 440
  • (January 13, 2020, 10:14:59 PM)
Users Online
Users: 0
Guests: 196
Total: 196

Online

196 Guests, 0 Users

From the Annals: A (Crude) Orcish Drinking Song 

Written by Kozgugore October 17, 2018, 11:10:00 AM
From the Annals: A (Crude) Orcish Drinking Song

Kosh'harg is nearly upon us again, which is a great time for tall tales and songs! One thing that has always struck me, however, is how few in-universe songs we actually have. Both from Blizzard as well as player-made, particularly orcish songs are quite scarce. Luckily, we did have the creative spirit or two join us every now and then, and Mazguul was certainly one of the most creatives ones you would find out there! During her time as Thur'ruk in the distant past, she wrote a fair few songs that may or may not have been inspired by other game songs. Granted, the following may be a little bit on the lewd side for some, but it's definitely her magnum opus among the ones she shared with us. I present to you, the Quillboar Song!



The Quillboar Song

  Bestiality sure is a fun thing to do
    But I have to say this as a warning to you:
    With almost all animals, you can have ball
    But the Quillboar can never be buggered at all!
   
    The spines on his back are too sharp for an orc
    They'll give you a pain in the worst place they ought
    The result I think you'll find will appal:
    The Quillboar can never be buggered at all!

    You can bugger the bear, if you do it with care,
    In the winter, when he is asleep in his lair,
    Though I would not advise it in spring or in fall-
    But the Quillboar can never be buggered at all!

    Mounting a horse can often be fun
    A huge kodo too; though he weighs half a ton
    Even a mouse, though his hole is quite small,
    But the Quillboar can never be buggered at all.

    Ravishing a cow while she goes moo-moo
    Will be entertaining to both her and you
    Or you might try a tiger, if you have enough gall
    But the Quillboar can never be buggered at all.

    A fish is refreshing, although a bit wet
    And a cat or a wolf can be more than a pet
    Even a giraffe, though it's ever so tall
    But the Quillboar can never be buggered at all.
   
    You can order or shoo 'im, or run a knife through 'im
    The one thing you cannot do is stick it to 'im.
    If you try to seduce 'im, you'll end in a fix,
    His prickles defend him against rampant pricks.

    You'll find that the Quillboar has hundreds of prickles,
    To other Quillboar those spines merely tickle,
    If buggering Quillboar is what gets you raving,
    Just remember that first of all you'll have to shave him,
   
    Else the spines on his back are so grom-damned thick
    You'll end up with naught but a perforate prick.
    Forgetting to pluck them has led to the call
    That a Quillboar can never be buggered at all!

    At the end of the day, when you've had your rough way
    With all of those creatures, you'll just have to say
    "That damned prickly beastie has been my downfall!"
    For the Quillboar can never be buggered at all!

About the author

Kozgugore registered at Orcs of the Red Blade on December 07, 2007, 11:48:24 PM and has posted 4215 posts in the boards since then. Last visit was May 07, 2024, 02:49:25 PM.