Messages

Yay! Our RP sparked a story! A lovely read Kintka. let me know if you want to borrow Frostfang again in the future. ^^

Yay! Kozzle stories! <3 Needs more Sinami though...

Yeah, it is a new RP venture. Different from ORB, but still in the same spirit in a way.

First drawing in two years! Wooooh!
My NE priestess Tinwëtar Ravenmist, Commander of the Nightblade Sentinels!



I also made this version, just for funsies:



It took forever to clean it up, let me tell you. How I wish I had a tablet. xD

I haven't been active for a very long time now, but I want to poke my nose into things anyway. I have to agree with Therak and Kogron. A hiatus seems to be the better option of them all, since the guild would change a little too much if it was opened up and lost its "orcs only" tag. The familiar feeling within the guild would vanish. Not that it would impact me directly, since my activity is spotty at best, but I am still reluctant to see it change into something unrecognizable. Better to go out with a bang and let us all cherish the wonderful memories we've created together.

I am playing every now and then and if people still want to meet up for small RP plots and things, or just to hang out in game, feel free to send me a PM for my btag.

So... saayyyy someone has never watched the TV show or even seen the book on a shelf. How would you describe it to that person.

Stormlight Archive sounds like it'd be interesting to read when I move out from my current Cyberpunk binge

Oh... err... dark medieval fantasy with a hint of realism. Extremely well written characters, unexpected plottwists, lots of political intrigue... no one is safe! But both A song of Ice and Fire as well as Stormlight Archive are pretty involved series. Not everyone likes that. A lot of people only want light fluff reading. Nothing wrong with that, I tend to like it too on occasion, but just so that you're aware that they are a lot more heavy than say the World of Warcraft books. But they're really immersive and captivating though, so well worth the time invested in reading them. And you should watch the TV series too. It's amazing.

[A Song of Ice and Fire]

Hmm... I see you've mostly read books based on games you like? Are you interested in books outside of the world of games/movies too? If so, I have a few tips...

A Song of Ice and Fire by George R.R. Martin - I don't think I need to explain this one...

Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien - First fantasy tale I ever heard (dad read it to me as a good night tale when I was about 3 years old) and I read the whole thing on my own when I was 10 and after that I was stuck. Only been reading fantasy since really.

Harry potter by J.K.Rowling - I feel an explanation for this one is pretty unecessary too really, but I really, really love it! I have grown up with Harry Potter, I re-read the books at least once a year and watch the movies at least twice a year.

The Black Jewels Trilogy by Anne Bishop - A series I can come back to over and over again. I think I have read through the triology like 10 times by now, and the followup books just as many times. I love them!

Mistborn by Brandon Sanderson - The first three books are amazing! The rest of the series did not captivate me as fully, but they're still good. The first three are a triology of their own really and can be read without reading the rest of the series. Fantastic world building, intriguing magical system and great characters.

Stormlight Archive by Brandon Sanderson - Brandon Sanderson's epic series. It is still in progress, but it is a really heavy duty fantasy series. Again, really intricate political intrigues, fascinating magical system and very well developed characters.

Daughter of the Forest by Juliet Marillier - A little more poetic and fairy tale-esque than the series mentioned above. Based on the celtic legend of the Children of Lir combined with the H.C.Andersen tale "The Wild Swans" and the brothers Grimm tale "The Six Swans". It's a really lovely story and as with the Anne Bishop one above I must have read it around 10 times by now.

The Deed of Paksenarrion and Paladin's Legacy by Elizabeth Moon - Another one of my all time favourites. The Deed of Paksenarrion is an epic adventure tale about the sheepfarmer's daughter Paksenarrion who wants to become a warrior. She joins a mercenary company and then her adventures really kick off. I thought the original trilogy was absolutely amazing and after having finished them I was left with a feeling of wanting more! I wanted to know what happened next! And apparently I wasn't the only one, since about 20 years after the original trilogy was published Elizabeth Moon released the follow up series called "Paladin's Legacy" and it is even better than the first series! Love them to bits!

My current favourite series at the moment though are Throne of Glass and A Court of Thorn and Roses by Sarah J. Maas. Wonderful series too. I'm waiting rather impatiently for the last book in the respective series right now and it is killing me... I will have to wait months, even a year, until they are released. >.<

Oooh! Nice one Kogra!

Very cute Rashka. ^^

I am recovering from a burnout IRL right now. Dealing with the aftermath of that is draining my energy to the point where I just want to log on and do something mindless, like quest/do dungeons etc.My creativity has sparked a few times over the past months, but not enough to warrant a full comeback to RP, which saddens me. I want to come back and create stories with you guys and get to know your characters and all, I just... can't. I can barely drag myself out of bed some days, so yeah. I hope to make a comeback eventually though. I just don't know when that will be.

[Part I - Night Terrors]

Part I - Night Terrors

Demons! The demons were everywhere! They kept raining down from the sky like fallen stars, making the earth shatter and bleed with the impact. And from the wounds green blood poured, vicious, burning and tainted. Their shrieks and screams heralded the oncoming wave of destruction and it swept across the lands like the violent rush of tide. There was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.
“Sinami Swifthowl. From today onward, I am yours forever…”
The words were barely above a whisper, but they still reached me through the din of clashing weapons and the agonized screams of the dying.
“…on this earth, until the very afterlife…”
Notch. Draw. Release. Arrow after arrow. Demon after demon. One laboured breath after the other. And yet they kept on coming. I fought on.
“…may the spirits punish me were I to ever break these vows…”
But I was so tired. Every arrow I notched to my bow seeped my strength a little bit further, wore me down bit by bit. I was a lonely island of life amidst a sea of death and corruption. A tiny flickering flame, its glow dimming by the minute.
“…and may our songs forever be joined together.”
The demons pressed closer and closer, smothering the very air I needed to breathe, the air I needed to stay alive. I kept on fighting… and fighting… and fighting… until my flame was finally snuffed out… forever…

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I woke with a silent scream of defiance and grief still on my lips. My throat felt raw and constricted and my heart beat wildly in my chest. A dream. Just a dream. I took a few gulps of air, such precious, wonderful air, and rested my forehead against my up drawn knees. Breathe in. Breathe out. My breathing sounded ragged but at least the deep breaths helped me regain control of the panic still surging through my body.

I raised my head again and found a pair of turquoise eyes studying me warily from across the fire.
*Again?*
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak just yet. I reached beside me and picked up my waterskin, taking a few mouthfuls to help soothe my sore throat.
*How many nights has it been now?*
“Five… six..? I don’t know. I can’t remember.” My voice came out a hoarse croak.
Ashensong let out a deep growl of annoyance as she padded around the fire to stand directly in front of me.
*This has to stop. You will drop dead from exhaustion otherwise.* Ashensong snapped her jaws in frustration, mere inches from my face. I didn't even flinch. I just stared back at her, annoyance flaring briefly in my own eyes.
“Any suggestion as to how I can make the dreams stop? My mind keeps replaying the horrors of the past few weeks over and over…”
*I have been right there with you every time. I know very well what your terrors show you every night.* The Garn’s rage was a living thing, beating against my already battered and fragile mind.

I closed my eyes and hung my head, seemingly not frightened in the least by having a fully grown, and furious, Garn snap her jaws so close to my face. Most others would probably have pissed themselves in fear and tried to turn tail and run at the first opportunity, but I wasn’t afraid. I knew the underlying reason for Ashensong’s fury and I knew it wasn’t directed at me. Not really. The Garn wanted simple solutions to her problems. If it was a threat, you killed it. But the night terrors weren’t simple and they definitely weren’t an easy kill. The lack of control frightened her and it frightened her even more to see her beloved pack sister’s strength fade away day by day, especially when she, a fierce and fearless Garn, was helpless to stop it. So I let the wolf snarl and snap, allowing my wolf sister’s rage on my behalf to wash over me like a soothing balm.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*I found it!* Ashensong’s excitement registered faintly in my foggy, sleep deprived mind, and I felt a tiny flicker of hope ignite in my chest. We had made slow progress today. I kept stumbling and I was barely aware of where I was going, but yet we still walked on. Ever searching, ever looking. We had to be even more careful these days, due to my diminishing strength. All it would take was one mistake and we would both feed the demons.

Another excited yip from Ashensong and I forced myself into a slow jog to catch up with the wolf, concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other.
*It is several days old, but it is there!* The Garn was almost dancing in place, joy and restless energy coursing through her body.
I took a deep breath, sniffing the air. Nothing…nothing…there! It was so faint that my senses barely even recognized it. If Ashensong hadn’t been absolutely positive it was there I probably would have dismissed it as a figment of my imagination, a trick played by my mind. It was a marvel that the Garn had even managed to pick up the scent at all since the air was so polluted with the stench of fel, but now, for the first time in weeks, we had hope.

So starting sometime tomorrow I will be offline for a little while, since Koz is comming to visit! <3 Not sure how long I'll be offline but around 2 weeks-ish at least. See you around peeps!

Nice to see Therak is still alive and kicking somewhere in the world. Nice little story! ^^

Thank you! It is supposed to be heartrending though, so that means I succeeded. ^^ Will write more when there is more to tell.

[finally]

A continuation of this: Not Strong Enough

I should never have come back. The thought had been churning in my mind for days now, ever since I laid eyes on Srelok again. I thought my time away had helped me come to terms with everything that had happened, that I had finally been able to put it behind me and move on. I was confident and comfortable in my decision to stay with Kozgugore. My devotion to him was unwavering, and because of it I had thought things would just be able to go back to normal between Srelok and me… the way they had been before everything had happened. Perhaps it had been naïve of me to think that way, or perhaps I just didn’t want to acknowledge the feelings that I had shoved so far down that I barely noticed they were there most of the time…but they were. And once I saw him again they came roaring back to the surface with a vengeance. The force of it was like being crushed beneath a mountain and I cursed the day I had befriended him in the first place.

It didn’t help that being back put me in the incredibly painful and awkward situation of being assaulted by his unguarded emotions at every freaking hour of the day either. I had slammed up walls around my own mind to keep him out, to stop him from noticing my feelings and the difficulties I were having in trying to cope with being near him again. I had no idea if he noticed or even cared, his emotions hadn’t revealed anything in that regard, but at least it kept him from knowing my feelings. But I was nowhere near skilled enough to keep my own emotions from escaping and keep his emotions from breaking through the barrier again and again. I could just do one thing at a time and to me the most important thing seemed to be to keep Srelok from ever realizing how much being close to him hurt me.

Before coming back I had made a promise to myself that I would do my very best to be a good friend to Srelok, just the way I had been before everything had happened. I would be someone he could talk to, a shoulder to cry on, whatever he needed. But it was easy to think that when distance had dulled our bond into near nonexistence. When faced with the actual harsh reality that promise proved to be extremely hard to keep. But I would be damned if I couldn’t do at least that much. I could pretend, I could be understanding, I could be a friend…even if every time I tried a small part of me died.

I had realized a long time ago that I would love them both until the day I died, but coming to terms with that realization and facing the consequences of it were two entirely different things. I loved Kozgugore beyond reason and I couldn’t quite believe that he had offered me a mating bond despite knowing that my heart would always be torn in two. But he had and it only made me love him more. But I still couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt and inadequacy that came over me when I thought about it. He deserved better, he deserved so much more. If I could have eradicated Srelok from my heart completely I would have done it. I had tried to on countless occasions in the wilds, but it had proven to be both fruitless and painful. Having the bond between us being as broken as it was right now was painful enough… as if a piece of me was missing, as if I had torn off an arm or a leg. And I couldn’t bring myself to sever it completely, since that would surely kill me.

I knew the pain would have been just as awful if it had been the other way around, if I had chosen Srelok instead of Kozgugore. They were both vital parts of me that I just couldn’t lose. But for all our sakes, and for the happiness of both Srelok and Kozgugore I had to let one of them go. Or at least try to. Srelok deserved to be loved and cared for, just as much as Kozgugore did, and I had to let him go so that he could find it. It was the only way. Even if a part of me died over and over again just thinking about it.

But I would be strong and I would give Kozgugore everything I had, all I could offer, and I would try to be Srelok’s friend even if our previous closeness was gone forever. I would be strong and not let anyone see just how much it hurt me. It was the least I could do after everything I had put them both through after all.

My decision made I turned around in my bedroll and snuggled a bit closer to Kozgugore, nuzzling his neck with the tip of my nose. His scent a soothing balm for my frayed heart and emotions. Just being near him dulled the ache in my chest and I finally allowed myself to feel true happiness that we were finally embarking on our mating hunt. I’d be his, completely, now and always. And for now, for this perfectly blissful moment where it was just him and me, I could ignore the small part of my heart that shouted BETRAYAL.